Together in Spirit

An online reading group ('TIS a reading group!) to bring together friends, and friends of friends, who aren't able to be in a conventional reading group due to constraints of time or geography.

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Plot spoiler for Back when we were grownups

This is a very thought-provoking book and well written to boot: “He closed the door so gently behind her that she thought at first it wasn’t latched. But it was.” (P 75) and Rebecca irrevocably became a Davitch. What her flirtation with retracing her steps to see if she could become someone else with Will showed clearly was that you never can go back. But didn’t really show her that you can change the ongoing direction. She thinks she doesn’t like the Davitch/Open Arms life she leads, but in fact, that is now who she is. Apart from the ongoing unrealised romantic potential of Zeb, I am left thinking she’s not going to make any changes at all. Which is depressing. But perhaps I missed some clues? I think family ties are a net – a safety net of support but also a gill net which hold you fast and may drown you – and I think that’s what this book is about.

One theme within it that I was also struck by was the impact of motherhood. In Rebecca’s case, amplified by having three instant step daughters, but for many women, sometime into the first few months or years of motherhood comes the realisation that this is it, whatever you may have thought life would be. Did Rebecca drown or did she become an accomplished high wire act, with the safety net beneath her?

Anyone know where I can buy a prayer toaster (p 260)?